Shouldn't have ended up this way
by RedRose108
Summary: Jill and Gordon in the early seasons. Caroline looks to be improving and Gordon seems to be falling for her again, leaving Jill out. They decide to go different ways but how can she when she makes an life changing discovery.
1. Chapter 1

Jill lay in bed thinking about last night, how much she enjoyed it and how right it felt for them to be together, but she knew it was wrong sleeping with him while his wife laid dying in a coma. She knew it had to wait no matter how she felt it wasn't fair for him, his wife or the children if she came storming into their lives

The next day

"Good morning doctor!" Lizzie cheerfully said

"Morning to you….umm may I have my patient notes" Jill said to Lizzie while watching Lizzie frantically searching through several papers on her desk

"Errrmm here we go…ahhh good morning doctor O…!" She said

Gordon quickly walked through reception without saying a word to anyone not even Jill who stood there very confused. She thought he enjoyed the night as much as she did. All the things he said to her, how beautiful she is and how she means the world to him. Was it all a lie..?

"Charming…" Lizzie mentioned

Jill wondered of to her office as usual, with thousands of questions running through her head.

Please review, and tell me if you would like to read more:D


	2. Chapter 2

It was halfway through afternoon surgery and Jill's next patient was about to arrive, the morning had been strange there was a lot of tension between Gordon and herself. The usual chats in the corridors and brief kisses behind doors didn't happen, Gordon seemed like he was in another world.

"Ok…Mr….Mr…..Yep Mr Woodlock what seems to be the problem today?"

Jill sat at her desk as her patient rambled about itchy skin and purple rashes, but Jill couldn't draw her attention away from all the questions buzzing through her head.

"Excuse me doctor….um are you listening?" the patient questioned

"Umm yes it doesn't sound too serious and it doesn't look too bad…."

"Doesn't look too BAD it is driving me crazy….do you actually know what you're talking about hey?"

"Sir I am fully qualified and it should calm down with this cream I'm going to prescribe you ok…"

Jill scribbled her proud signature on the prescription pad and quickly ripped the paper of the pad and gave to the man.

"Please do come back if the rash persists Mr Woodlock" she said to the patient as he was leaving the her office

"Woman doctors….truly incompetent!" he mumbled to Dr Jeff Goodwin who was standing outside Jill's office

Jill followed the patient out to find Jeff waiting outside her door.

"Another happy customer Jill?" Jeff joked to Jill

She sighed

"So Jeff what can I do for you?"

"Well I've got a real puzzler on my hands could you help me out?"

"Yeah sure…hey I was about to walk down to the gardens lets walk and talk"

The walked across the road and made their ways to the gardens.

"So he has a high temperature and a pretty nasty leg ulcer…"

Jeff was cut off when both of their attention was drawn to the voice coming from behind them.

"G..Gordon..?" Jill said looking at his serious and confused face

"I'll leave you two, too it" Jeff said as he started to walk away"

They stood in silence for a few minutes though it felt like an eternity for Jill as millions of silly questions made their way through her brain. What did he want? Why hadn't he talked to her today? Did he love her?

"Sorry I've been a bit distant today….family troubles" Gordon sighed

"ohhh….I see" Jill said with a particular look on her face which Gordon miss read

"Look Jill I said I'm sorry and if that's not enough for y…." Gordon said but Jill cut him off

"I'm sorry Gordon I'm just thinking of myself" a tear fell from her eye

She wiped the tears away and made herself presentable again.

"Anyway how are you and the children…?"

"I told….I told them that their mum probably won't be returning home again. For the past months I've put it off, telling them she would wake up when I knew inside she wouldn't"

"Gordon you don't know that"

"DON'T I"

Jill looked at Gordon as he said those last words, his voice thickened with emotion she saw how much it hurt him to talk about his wife, while he had feelings for her. This whole situation was frustrating for her but she knew her feeling couldn't matter now it wasn't about her anymore.

"Look I'm going to back away for a bit let you get your life back in order…ok?"

"What's the point Jill…hey what's the bloody point?"

"There is AlWAYS a point Gordon you have to believe me…come here." Jill explained while putting her hands on each side of his face.

Jill put her arms out and hugged Gordon with all her heart, he did the same. Once again she felt like it was meant to be, all her feelings came flooding back the ones she fought so hard to push away. She didn't want it to end, but she pulled away. Gordon wiped the tears off her face a kissed her briefly on her soft lips. They walked back to the hospital together.


	3. Chapter 3

The next month or so went on pretty much the same, the enjoyed each other's company and cherished every moment they got alone together. But lately things had been different he they had not seen much off each other and Gordon's home life hadn't been getting much better either, his wife still gravely ill and his farther in law had been nosing around. The talked through it a number of times and they wanted to step back from each other.

"Gordon..?" Jill said as she knocked at Gordon's office door

"What Jill!"

"Oh I'm sorry…umm I'll come back later"

"Jill you have come and interrupted my morning so what on earth do you want!" he rudely replied

"Well if you're going to be like that why should I bother?"

"Jill I thought we agreed that were over….so what are you playing at?"

"Playing in at!….god Gordon you really are incredible at times, I now you have problems but you're not the only one ok, look around you every single person has problems! You know what you mean hey?"

"Really Jill? So what are your problems compared to mine?"

Jill stood in shock that last comment really shocked her, how could he be that stubborn? Or was she just been harsh?

"Ok Gordon maybe mine are small but there still there, maybe if you talked through it with someone, it may help"

"You mean yourself don't you?"

"Not necessarily…"

"I thought we agreed not to this…cry on each other's shoulders that was a good plan"

"Well were friends Gordon and that is what friends do"

"We were always only friends Jill"

"Sorry I'm not following…?

"I mean you were my way out"

"Way out… what are you talking about?"

"I don't love you…I never did I've realised, when the accident happed and I saw Caroline lying there I realised just how much I loved her and I didn't feel that for you"

sorry to leave it there, the conversation may go on in the next chapter, just a bit busy at home. I will update soon though please review and leave your comments:D


	4. Chapter 4

By that point Jill was frozen she couldn't move, tears were begging to swell up in her eyes. Her life really had turned upside down. She knew that they had agreed to let each other go but somewhere in her heart she hoped that he would come back to her and she was sure he felt the same. She forced the tears back and stood up for herself.

"Why Gordon why would you do that to someone…?"

"Just go Jill….GET OUT NOW!"

Jill ran out and into her office were she fell against the door and slid down, she couldn't hold the tears in any more, her lips trembled as tears rolled down her pale face. She knew she shouldn't be feeling like this as Gordon and herself were over before he said those things to her, but what truly broke her heart was the fact that he lied to her all those times. For once in her life she thought she had someone who loved her, someone who cared, not just some man who used her for a fun time then was never to be seen again. That was all a lie though; Jill was sick of been used and mistreated by men, all her life she was told what to do by them. Even now in her job men still dominate what she does, but worst of all was love men just played with her. Sure she could pick up any man; she was pretty and had a good paying job, according to them she had it all but there were still many things missing for her.

Jill had lost her motivation in everything she did no longer did she look forward to going to work and had that smile that could light up anyone's day, she came to work, went home, had dinner, quiet glass of red before bed then slept. Gordon hadn't spoken to her for days, they kept their distance from each, he too hadn't been looking to happy lately and was deeply confused by his feelings. He knew what he said to Jill was wrong and uncalled for but could not bring himself to apologise he had too much pride and almost was embarrassed in some strange way.

* * *

That night

Jill couldn't sleep, kept on turning and was continually confused about how she got things so wrong with Gordon. It had been a hard and long day; half of the town had gone down with gastro and the other half with the flu. The surgery was full and so were the wards, everyone was run off there feat.

It was early in the morning when woke up, she sat on the side of her bed, not ready to face another day at work, when suddenly she was overcome with the feeling of nausea and ran to the bathroom. She held her hair back then promptly vomited, she sat by the toilet thinking of what had caused this. She put it down to the fact that she did indeed work in a hospital so she had probably picked up a stomach bug there.

She didn't feel like breakfast that day so she went upstairs and got dressed; she put her hair into a perfect ponytail and the beehive of course. She then continued to do her make-up. She gazed into the mirror to see a sad and pale face which was confused, she wacked on some foundation to cover up the pale skin and dark circles under her eyes, the proceeded to do the eye make-up. By the time she was done she was already late for work.

Will update soon please review and leave you thoughts


	5. Chapter 5

Jill managed to pass through reception without anyone noticing especially Lizzie as she didn't really feel like extended chat today. She was soon stoped in her tracks by the one and only Mr Rose

"Right your 40 yr. old, fat and female surgery patients are holding up my list woman, get them done as I have a golf tournament a 2.00pm sharp today!" he shouted

Jill felt a puff smoke touch her face and then once again felt overcome with nausea. She ran to sink in her office and threw up. She felt awful, she really didn't know how she was going to get through the day.

* * *

"Right since you are holding me up Jill if I may sit in on this procedure to examine your handy work!" Mr Rose puffed with smoke

"It would be my pleasure Mr Rose"

"Scalpel please..."

Jill made her first incision into the women's skin, felt the patient's body resit and watch the blood start running out. She had always been good with blood and all but this time it made her feel queasy.

"Suction sister please….I can't see a thing"

Jill suddenly stepped away from the operating table and came over all dizzy

'"What do you think you're doing women" Mr Rose said as he watched Jill stumble her way out of the operating theatre.

Sorry Mr Rose you're going to have to take over on this one" she said


	6. Chapter 6

Jill sat at her desk confused she'd gastro before plenty of times but never felt like this. She suddenly clutched her stomach as she felt something twinge inside her, Then it came to her.

No I couldn't be, not now things are already extremely complicated, I've fallen in love with a married, had a shameful affair, found out it was all a lie and now plus a baby. If it was true Jill couldn't be happy, it was just a nightmare, what else could happen to her?

* * *

It had been a few days since Jill had suspicions about being pregnant, but until today nothing had been confirmed. Jill picked up the letter of the coffee table in the middle of her living room she stared at the un-creased, perfect piece of paper but she was more than certain that the content was far less than perfect. She gasped and put her hand over her mouth as she crossed checked every word wishing she had read wrong, tears ran down her face and she collapsed onto the couch in shock, thoughts running through her head. Did she want it? What would he Gordon think? How was she going to tell him?

Jill couldn't sleep that night spent most of it wandering around the house thinking. Her whole life she had been carving out exactly what she was going to do, university student, career women, doctor and hopefully someone to share all those experiences with, but not like this and not now.


	7. Chapter 7

"Hey Jill…wait?

It had been a few days since Jill found out the news, Gordon had apologised to Jill and he hoped that they could salvage a friendship out of it. Gordon had always felt attracted to Jill but was still confused about how he really felt maybe it was love. Despite been confused he told Jill that he did love her and wanted things to change so they could get close again so he invited her to dinner so they could talk things through.

"Ohh hi Gordon…" Jill said

"Hi umm I'm sorry Jill, I won't be able to make it to dinner tonight…is that ok?"

"Dinner…?"

"Yeah I'm sorry I can't there has been some improvement in Caroline's condition so I'm going over to Leeds tonight" Gordon said with a smile on his face

"Ohh…its ok I wasn't feeling very well…."

"Yeah you do look a bit pale…you sure you're ok?"

"Yeah fine …"

She felt her heart sink, his wife was improving, it wasn't that she didn't want that to happen, it was just all too complicated for her. She was at breaking point; nothing had been going her way in life it was falling in to thousands of tiny pieces.

Gordon made his way over to Leeds, expecting to hear of some improvement but instead it was anything but that.

"Mr Ormerod….sorry Doctor come this way"

Gordon followed the doctor to his wife's room but before they went on inside the doctor stopped walking. Gordon looked at the doctor's facial expression; he could see it written all over his face.

"No...she can't be" Gordon said with concern and emotion

please review:D


	8. Chapter 8

"Umm I'm sorry doctor she passed away about 20 minutes ago"

Gordon just stood there in complete shock and relief; it was over all over no more secretes no more pain. He walked in to her room and sat beside the iron lung.

"I loved you when I married you, but we both knew it wasn't working…."

"We had fun those first years, but it wasn't really love in the end was it hey….?"

"I'm so sorry Caroline it shouldn't have ended up this way"

Gordon was trying to convince himself that he didn't love coralline and he did had feelings for Jill but he was shocked when he felt a tear from his eye run down his face, he thought it would be a relief when she died he knew he might have been sad but not like this. He was actually crying and in deep despair. It wasn't meant to be like this, before the crash he was going to leave Caroline and be with Jill. Then the crash turned his world upside down. He accepted the fact that she would die in the end. Then he could finally be with Jill, but he wasn't sure if he wanted that, he wasn't sure that he even loved Jill.

At Jill's house

Jill felt terrible, the morning sickness had lasted throughout the day and it didn't look like it was going to stop at night. She needed Gordon, to hold her hand, pull her hair back as she vomited and most of all to be there for her when she needed him most. She knew that couldn't be as he had a sick wife that was about to make a recovery, she also knew keeping such important information from him was wrong.

Jill simply wanted to pick up the phone and get him over to her place where she could tell him the news but she couldn't. He was probably out celebrating the good news about his wife, not giving one thought about her. She knew that Gordon loved her but his wife needed him now.

Jill sat on the couch alone on a cold winter's day, not a sound in her small house and cold winds traveling through the house out of fireplaces. She was suffering in silence, it shouldn't have ended up this way, she thought.


	9. Chapter 9

The next day at work, Jill had decided that she had no choice but to tell Gordon, as it might be a better time as his wife was improving. Meanwhile Gordon came to work as usual but hadn't told anyone that his wife had died last night. He couldn't cope with everyone saying sorry and so on, because he had betrayed his wife and kids and didn't deserve any of this kindness. All last night he had been thinking about Jill, he never really loved her. It was all an escape from his terrible home life when he was with Jill it would all go away she made him feel good and that was all, it wasn't real love for him.

"ahhh my old chap…how is that lady wife of yours I heard she had improved" Mr Rose enthusiastically said to Gordon as they walked down the corridor.

Gordon escaped the awkward question when Jill poked her head out her office door and into the corridor.

"G…Gordon…?" Jill said

"Are sorry Mr Rose I'll fill you in later ok" Gordon mumbled

Gordon wondered off to Jill's office to see what she wanted.

Gordon looked up at Jill's tear stained face.

"What's wrong?"

"Umm…well…."

"For god's sake just spit it out Jill!"

"I'm Pre…Pregnant Gordon…"

"Your what!"

"I'm so sorry Gordon…I di…"

"You deliberately did this didn't you….you couldn't stand the fact that I might of gone back to Caroline….could you hey?"

"No… that's not true"

Jill sobbed and sobbed that she didn't mean for this to happen but he wouldn't listen.

"Where are you going gor…Gordon…?" Jill said as he started to leave the room

"I'm leaving you Jill…I want nothing to do with you ok!"

"But the b...baby?"

"Get rid of it!"

"What! You mean have an abortion….?

"yeah..!" he said with such anger in his tone

"I want nothing to do with either of you….I don't love you! I never did!"

And with that Gordon stormed out of her office, leaving Jill uncontrollably sobbing, what was she ever going to do?


	10. Chapter 10

Gordon ran out of the hospital and sat in his car, he couldn't take in what had happened in the last 24 hours and how much his life had changed. A baby? Of course he loved Jill and wanted nothing more to start a family with her, he had been so stupid these last few days but he had excuses, he had just lost his wife. Gordon knew that it wasn't good enough though, no real excuse for the way he treated Jill, not a thought until now of what she was feeling. She had been so good him these last few months and what had he given back? He wanted nothing more than to ran back and claim her but he thought it would be for the best to let the dust settle, but was that going to be too late?

* * *

Jill sat in her office alone for a good twenty minutes she had stopped crying and thought about how would deal with this. Jill couldn't have an abortion over the short time of knowing she was expecting she had actually started to warm to the idea of being a mum. If Gordon didn't want to support her she would have to do it herself. Jill thought long and hard about this and she couldn't bring up Gordon's child in the same town let alone work with the man. She had to move on and start fresh somewhere else. She made a few calls and found a vacant locum post at Leeds general which would suit her just for the time being before she could apply for something more permanent. Then she started to write her resignation,

_Mr Middleditch and Head Partner,_

_Please accept this letter as notification that I am resigning from my job effective tomorrow. I apologise for not being able to give more notice. However, I regret that, due to circumstances beyond my control, I need to resign right away. _

_Please forward my final pay to my home._

_Thank you for the support that you have provided me during my work with the Practise._

_Sincerely,_

_Mrs Jill Weatherill_

Jill made herself look presentable once again then made her way to Gordon's and Mr middleditch's offices and placed the each a copy of the resignation. Jill walked for probably the last time through the corridor's then made her way out through reception without a word to anyone. She stopped outside and looked back at the hospital with the cold winters wind blowing her hair onto her face. This was something she just had to do, the hospital wasn't her home anymore and she couldn't see herself having a future here either. Moving to Leeds would be a fresh start for both of them and new adventure. With that Jill slowly walked to her small green mini and drove away for the last time, it was just the baby and her now.


	11. Chapter 11

At Jill's house

Jill made her final arrangements for her move and booked and hotel for the night, upstairs she packed all of her clothes and most of her belongings in to suitcases then one by one ran them down to her green mini. Jill thought it wouldn't be fair to Gordon not explaining were she was going all though he had no right to be asking those kinds of questions, so she deicide to write an letter to him.

The final suitcase was packed and put into the car she went back upstairs to collect the letter and the house keys which lay on her bed. Once Jill had got them she ran back down but unfortunately lost her balance sending her crashing down the stairs. She rolled down many times violently crashing her body and head into the walls numerous times and grazing her whole body against the hard wooden stairs, pain rushed through her body. She made one final scream for help and then moaned in pain before it all went away and finally she landed on the cold and harsh tiles at the bottom of the stairs. She was covered in cuts, grazes and bruises and left unconscious. She lay there in her cold and dark house all alone with a cold breeze sweeping though the house from the front door.

* * *

Gordon had come home from work early to get the kids. By now the kids were happily sleeping and he also had the nanny to help him. He sat thinking about what he had said to Jill and how upset she was. He did love her so much more than he could ever say. He needed to know how she was and to apologise to her, the baby wasn't planned, but he was sure he could work something out with her.

please review


	12. Chapter 12

At Jill's house

Gordon pulled up into Jill's drive way, strangely the front door was slightly open but there were no lights on in the house. Gordon wondered what was going on and if she was actually home. Gordon got out of his car and made his way up to the front door.

"Jill..?" he shouted while slowly opening the front door

It was dark so he couldn't see much but he could vaguely make out a figure lying on the floor.

"Jill?" is that you he asked before rushing to the lights and switching them on; he froze when he saw Jill on the floor.

"Ohh god Jill!" he rushed to her side trying to wake her up franticly.

"Come on love Jill wake up…!" still trying to wake her up but she was still unconscious.

Tears came running down his face as he examined every beautiful feature of her body.

"God how did this happen?" he whispered while he noticed the large cut on her head and the bruises everywhere else, then he was alarmed even more when he saw the large pool of blood surrounding her legs. He quickly undid her blouse and then examined the large bruises on her abdomen and chest and felt for a pulse.

"It's going to be ok, you hear me Jill it's going to be just fine my love" he shouted with such desperation and fear .

"I do love you…both of you"

"I want you to have this baby with me it will be perfect ok...come on Jill wake up please!" he sobbed as she started to rouse a bit then moan in pain.

Her breathing was fast same as her pulse and she looked to have internal injuries and bleeding. To add to that a deep head lack and possible rib, wrist and leg fractures, she was in one of a mess from just falling down the stairs.

please review


	13. Chapter 13

"Hello the royal Lizzie speaking"

"Lizzie…!"

"Dr Ormerod is that you what on earth is the matter?"

"Lizzie I need an ambulance…at Jill's place she has had a fall and is losing a lot of blood..!"

"At once doctor" Lizzie said

"Matron he needs an ambulance he is at her place…she's losing blood or summat …!"Lizzie explained

"Who Lizzie? Speak in a straight line will you" matron replied

"It's Dr Ormerod he is at Dr Weatherills place and she has had some sort of fall!"

"Ok Lizzie I'll inform casualty and Mr Rose you get the ambulance"

He sat with Jill waiting for the ambulance and checking her breathing ever so often. He looked around and saw a large suit case and an envelope in her hand. Why on earth did she have a suitcase for? He took hold of the enveloped and read that it was address to him. He opened it and began to read,

_Gordon,_

_I sort of understand why you don't want me but I could never get rid of the child no matter what the situation was. I've chosen to move start somewhere fresh over in Leeds, sorry to leave with such short notice but I couldn't stay it is all too complicated. I still love you Gordon and I will always no matter what but it wasn't healthy and you have made you position clear with me. I hope once the dust settles a bit you can come a see me and maybe talk things through better, but I do understand if you would prefer not to. _

_I wish you and your family a very happy and safe life and hope every gets sorted out for you._

_Jill Xx_

"Oh Jill you've got it all wrong love I love you too and were all going to be very happy together nothing will stop us now. It will be you and me with the children, I should of told you but Ca..Caroline died I'm so sorry my love"

Jill slowly opened her eyes and looked at Gordon then started to cry with pain, Gordon held her head in his lap and stroked her cheek. He held her cold hand tightly while she slowly went back to sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

"Jill darling you have to try to stay awake" he said while he gently shook her but had no success

"Jill!" he screamed

Finally the ambulance arrived and he stayed by her side, she awoke in the ambulance but was very groggy and wasn't making much sense; still Gordon whispered words of comfort and love to her the whole time. He kept held of her cold hand as she was rushed in to casualty, not wanting to leave her side. This shouldn't have ended up this way.

* * *

"Low blood pressure, fast pulse and she's losing a lot of blood from somewhere..?" Dr Goodwin explained to Mr Rose

"What on earth happened?" Mr Rose curiously asked

"Fell down the stairs" Gordon replied

She moaned in pain as Mr Rose felt her stomach.

"Sorry my dear….hmmm we've seem to have bleeder here, where is this blood coming from though? Mr Rose puffed

"G…Gordon the b...baby please" Jill managed to whimper out in pain

"It's ok love, it will all be fine" he whispered back to her

"The blood…well she is pregnant…"Gordon mention

"Well more reason to act fast wheel her into theatre at once!" Mr Rose demanded

Gordon watched as his true love is wheeled in to theatre, her and the baby's life hanging in the balance.

About twenty minutes had passed since Jill went to theatre; he sat in matron's office drinking sweet tea. They always gave tea to waiting relatives but he didn't see how it helped much. He and matron sat in silence but that wasn't the case in theatre.

"For god's sake nurse suction I can't see a thing" Mr Rose yelled

"Arrrhh ruptured spleen I'm going to have to rip it out, clamp nurse!"

"Mr Rose her blood pressure is falling and her pulse well it's very weak!" Jeff said with concern

"Ok she's crashing nurse stat compressions" Jeff yelled

"1…2…3…4…5…1...2...3" the nurse said

"No pulse we will have to zap her!" Mr Rose ordered

"But we can't it will kill the baby…" jeff said

"The baby is dead already Jeff…..charge to 200….and Clear!" Mr Rose explained

"No pulse….what you mean the baby's dead?" Jeff questioned

"Her uterus is torn I can repair that but can't save the baby….charge again….and clear!"

"Still nothing…adrenalin going in….nothing!" Jeff shouted

"Resume compressions nurse" Mr Rose said

"1…2…3…4…5…1...2...3" the nurse said

please review


	15. Chapter 15

"One more try ok…..and charging….clear!' Mr Rose explained

"Ok sinus rhythm…quick as you can Mr Rose I don't how much longer she will hold on for!" Jeff said with some relief

"I can't rush this Goodwin and I still have to repair the tare then reset the fractured leg"

"She won't hold on for that long…look her blood pressure is already falling again!"

"Mr Rose! What are you going to do!" Jeff yelled

"Umm ok I'll repair the uterus but luckily the fracture leg isn't blocking blood flow so we will just have to leave it for now…" Mr Rose replied

"Ok what about the fractured ribs she has and pneumothorax" Jeff mentioned

"I'll but a chest tube in after this ok that should work for a while! Just on thing at a time man"

* * *

There was a knock on matrons office door, Gordon couldn't move he didn't want to know what had happened he hoped so much that the baby and her would be ok.

"Come in Mr Rose" matron replied when she opened the door

"Is she ok?" Gordon asked with concern

"well she came through surgery just but she had a rough time we had to zap her 4 times and there were complications, we had no time to reset the leg so it has temporally got a cast on for now…..but she is stable now but not out of the woods…" Mr Rose spoke serious

"You…you had to zap here?" as much as Gordon tried to stop it tears started to form on run down his face.

"I'm sorry Gordon the baby didn't survive, her uterus tore and I had to remove her spleen and tomorrow I'll take her back to theatre to fix the leg" Mr Rose said

"I know it is none of my business but was the baby yours?" matron asked

"Yeah it….it was…oh god! Umm can I sit with her?" Gordon replied while try to hold his emotions back

* * *

Gordon walked into the dim room were Jill was resting, he sat down next to Jill and stroked her thick and silky dark hair with his hands while holding her hand tighter than ever. He wished he had handled the situation better, than none of this would have happened. If she didn't start to leave would of never of fallen and lost their baby, they would have had a beautiful baby together and watch it grow up, but that was all taken from them and he couldn't forgive himself.

"Oh my love I'm so sorry"

"You really scared me there for a minute I do love you, I love you so much…please love wake up I need you"

He sat with her for the whole night wishing she would wake up; she looked so beautiful he thought even though her face was bruised and had various cuts on it.


	16. Chapter 16

The next few days were the same she hadn't woken up yet and Gordon sat with her whenever he got the chance. Her leg had been reset and things were starting to look up for her recovery.

"Come in" Gordon answered

"Dr Ormerod she's awake….she is very restless and confused could you come and sit with her it would help I think"

"Does she know about the baby?" he questioned

"No, not yet we thought you may like to tell her"

"I see, thank you sister"

Gordon followed sister in to her room where he heard her screaming in pain.

"Jill calm down we will give you something to control the pain in a minute I just need to shine the torch in to your eyes ok?" Jeff said

"No get off me, I want to go home please" she cried out

"Jill your injured and you need your rest, here this is for the pain" Jeff said as he administered some pain relief.

Gordon ran and grabbed hold of her hand and stroked her face while she moaned in pain, later on her pain had gone and she had calmed down a bit but still very agitated about what had happened. Gordon whispered words of comfort to her while she came familiar with her surroundings. Then once the others had left he began to explain.

"The spleen it had t…" Gordon said but Jill cut him off

"I don't care about any of that…what about the b…baby?"

Gordon looked at her with sadness all over his face he was trying to find a pleasant way off saying their baby had died but there wasn't one.

please review


	17. Chapter 17

"G…Gordon..? Jill questioned

"I'm so sorry there was nothing they could do ….Jill I'm sor..."

He stopped as tears began to fall from his eyes, he watched as Jill lips began to tremble and her hands started to shake. She shook her head and started to cry uncontrollably.

"nooo no please say it's not true…" she sobbed

"It will be ok I promise I love you Jill it will be ok…come on love"

"How can you say that….the b..ba..baby is dead…so how is it G… Gordon"

"I'm so sorry Jill…"

Gordon sat there, trying to comfort Jill, but nothing seemed to settle her. He hated seeing her being upset and felt the exact same way but couldn't show it because of all the things he said to her about wanting her to have an abortion, How could he grief for something he never said wanted , but he knew that Jill having their baby wasn't a bad thing. It would have been the best thing that happened to him in a long while.

For the rest of the night Gordon sat with Jill, reassuring her she cried. She never cried or showed her emotion very often but this time she couldn't hold it in. Neither of could see how things had gone so downhill in such a short space of time. He comforted her for the whole night as she cried and cried and they grieved for their lost. He knew that they loved each other and they would both get thought this eventually together it would just take time. As she lay there in and out of sleep he told her about the future and how she was to move in and they would all be a family. His fingers ran though her hair and stroked her soft and pale cheeks before moving to holding her hand and whispered …

"Shouldn't have ended up this way"

The End

Please review and tell me how I went as it is my first fanfiction for this show. Also tell me if you would like to hear more Royal fanfics:D

-THANKS FOR READING:-D


End file.
